For Rivkie

Memories of the flesh

I buy myself silk robes because I like how soft they feel against my skin and then I refuse to apologize

I use words too big for people to understand because I like how they feel playing along my tongue

My body is a home for soft feelings and sugary delights

I bake bread and eat it fresh dipped in butter

I say that I prefer this to love but of course I miss her fingers on my skin

Some nights I still can't fall asleep because the world is too quiet without her heartbeat

And some nights I sleep warm from fresh bread and soft in silk robes and I think that everything might

be alright again some day